Are you offensive when you network? I got a very interesting e-mail this week from a colleague I had never met before. He subscribes to my e-mail list, so he gets my weekly content, but we have never actually connected in-person or online. That means his initial e-mail to me was our first one-on-one networking opportunity – and it also formed my first impression of him.
Related:5 Networking Mistakes And How To Easily Avoid Them
This was the opening of the message:
Dear J.T.,As a career coach, I enjoy all your e-mails and online seminars. But as a college and high school English teacher, I really MUST object to you (and other people who think bigger words must sound more erudite) making a short verb longer...
The e-mail went on for two more paragraphs citing specific uses of grammar that upset him in a recent article he had received. Are you starting to see where I am going with this?
I Am Open To Feedback, Just Get To Know Me First!
This reader made the classic mistake of thinking because he subscribes to my content, we have a relationship that would make me immediately open to his extensive, passionate criticism. I understand many folks who read content from someone on a regular basis start to feel as if they know the author personally. I also realize he paid a compliment first.
Yet, everyone knows compliments are negated when they are followed up by a big old, “BUT.” Now, I love it when people whom I respect and trust provide me with valuable feedback. In fact, that’s where the problem lies in this situation...
Earn My Trust And Respect First, Criticize Second
When it comes to making a first impression, there are rarely second chances. So, we all need to consider what we want that person to “feel” about us initially. Do we want them to have a good feeling or bad feeling?
More importantly, which one would lay the foundation for building the trust and respect needed to create a strong networking partnership?
I’m sorry folks, but I don’t know many people who get a warm fuzzy feeling when they get heavily criticized by someone the first time they meet. In my experience, you must acquire trust and respect through positive interaction first, then you earn the right to criticize.
And If You Must Criticize... Ask, Don’t Tell!
As a career coach, I find if I want to have a delicate dialog with a client that involves criticizing them, I start by asking a lot of questions. The questions are designed to help me understand where they are coming from and why they do the things they do.
In short, I’m assessing their knowledge and decision making process.
This works well because often, before I have to criticize, we are able to have a meaningful conversation around the benefits of trying something different without me having to directly criticize them. In the case of the career coach above, I would have appreciated his perspective more if he had first inquired as to why I chose to write in a style that sometimes ignores traditional grammar rules. He would have learned I focus on content and delivery, which means, there are times when I choose to ignore grammar rules for effect.
Maybe then we could have had an interesting e-mail dialog about the pros and cons of adhering to the grammar rules he swears by. He would have earned my respect and trust instead of coming across as arrogant and inconsiderate.
Ironically, Seasoned Professionals Are Often The Worst At This
Folks, the next time you are dying to send a, “Here’s what’s wrong with what you do,” e-mail, please consider the above. You could be burning a valuable bridge. It’s a small professional world out there, and we are just six degrees of separation away from one another (just ask LinkedIn). Better to craft a strategy that earns you the right to criticize. You’ll be glad you did.
I actually work on this with many folks on this. I find that, in particular, seasoned professionals tend to feel they have earned the right to criticize and forget to filter their networking. They end up creating a negative personal brand that hurts their career. Especially, if they are between jobs and been looking for work for a while.
Your Next Step
School teaches you everything except how to get the job. You must invest time in learning the right way to job search.
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Is your job search turning into a grind with no end in sight? It may be time to take a step back and reevaluate your entire approach.
In cold weather climates, the beginning of spring is a time to clean the house and get organized—a practice known as spring cleaning. Through the years, spring cleaning has taken on a larger meaning with people using the time to organize and declutter things in their lives.
For professionals on the job hunt, a little spring cleaning (metaphorically speaking) could be a great way to reinvigorate your job search. Here are a few strategies your job search spring cleaning should include.
Reevaluate Your Job Search Approach
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Make a list of the last handful of jobs you applied for and see if you can identify any positive or negative trends. Consider things like:
How did I learn about this job?
How did I apply for the job?
Did I earn an interview?
What was the ultimate result?
A lot can be learned about your job search approach just by answering these questions and identifying patterns. For example:
Negative Trends
You discovered five jobs through job boards, applied to all of them via the job boards, and never heard back from any of them.
The common pattern here is applying through job boards. This isn't to say that job boards don't serve a purpose in the job search process, but they have their limitations, and you can't run your job search entirely off of them. When you apply through a job board, there's a good chance that your materials will never get past the applicant tracking system (ATS) and never be seen by an actual person.
One simple fix is to research who the hiring manager or recruiter is that posted the position and email your materials to them directly.
The more efficient fix would be to take a proactive approach by putting together a bucket list of companies that you want to work for and start making connections on LinkedIn with people who work at those companies. You may already know some people who work there or have connections that can refer you to some individuals.
This is a great way to network your way onto a company's radar.
Positive Trends
You applied to three jobs via referral, were invited to two job interviews, and made it through multiple rounds of interviews for one of the jobs before being passed over for someone with a little more experience.
The pattern here is that getting referred to a job by a professional acquaintance is a great way to land a job interview. This indicates that you're leveraging your network well and you should continue to focus on your networking efforts.
The next step is to review the interview process and determine what went well and what needs to be improved. Sometimes the interviewer will provide feedback, and that feedback can be valuable. However, not everyone is comfortable with giving feedback.
Chances are you probably have a good idea about areas of improvement and the skills you need to gain. Put together a plan for addressing those shortfalls.
The good news in making it deep into any interview process is that it indicates that the company likes you as a potential employee (even if the timing just wasn't right) and the experience could be a roadmap to a job with that company at a later date, or another similar opportunity elsewhere.
Give Your Resume & Cover Letter Some Much-Needed Attention
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Are you continuously sending similar resumes and cover letters to each job opening with only minor adjustments? If so, your strategy needs some serious spring cleaning.
The reason why it's so important to tailor your resume is that throughout your career, you acquire numerous skills, but the job you're applying for may only be focusing on 6-8 of those skills. In that case, those skills must rise to the top of the resume with quantifiable examples of how you successfully used those skills at previous jobs.
Remember, recruiters go through hundreds of resumes. They need to be able to tell from a quick glance whether or not you're a potential candidate for the position.
While updating your resume, you could also spruce up your LinkedIn profile by highlighting the skill sets that you want to be noticed for by recruiters.
As for writing a good cover letter, the key to success is writing a disruptive cover letter. When you write a disruptive cover letter, you're basically telling a story. The story should focus on how you connect with the particular company and job position. The story could also focus on your personal journey, and how you got to where you currently are in your career.
If your resumes and cover letters aren't unique, now is the time to clean things up and get on track.
Build Your Personal Brand
Just because you're looking for work doesn't mean that you don't have anything to offer. Use previous career experiences and passions to build your personal brand.
Ask yourself, "How do I want other professionals to view me?"
Pick an area of expertise and start sharing your knowledge and experience with your professional network by pushing out content on your LinkedIn and social media accounts. Good content can include blogs, social media posts, and videos.
By sharing content about your experiences and passions, you slowly build your personal brand, and others will start to notice. The content could lead to good discussions with others in your network. It could also lead to reconnecting with connections that you haven't spoken to in years, or making new connections.
You never know when one of these connections could turn into a job lead or referral. The trick is to get on people's radars. So, when you're cleaning up your job search, be sure to build a plan for personal branding.
Maintain Healthy Habits During Your Job Search
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Your job search is important, but it's even more important to know when to pull back and focus on personal health and spending time with family and friends.
There are actually things that you can do for your own enjoyment that could help your job search in the long run, such as:
Grab coffee with a friend - It's good to engage in light conversation with friends during challenging times. And if your job search does come up, remember that most people have been through it themselves and you never know when a friend may provide you with a good idea or lead on a job.
Volunteer - Volunteering is a great way to get involved in the community and help others. In addition, if you develop a little bit of a career gap while looking for a job, you can always talk about how you filled that time volunteering, if you're asked about it during a job interview.
Continue to focus on other passions - Are you a fitness nut? Blogger? Crafter? Continue to do the things that bring you happiness. And if you're in a position to profit from your passion through a freelance job or side hustle, even better!
Spring is the perfect time to clean up and improve your job search so you can land the job you want. If you're struggling to find a job, follow the tips above to reinvigorate your job search—and watch your career blossom!
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This article was originally published at an earlier date.
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