Each update brings another small dose of clarity for our members. A slightly smoother path. One less point of confusion. But it's been a process—and if I'm being honest, it's a process that never really ends.
Here's what I've learned while making update after update.
The Core Tension Is Real
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As community builders, we're trying to do something almost impossible in those first 7-14 days. We need new members to:
- Feel confident navigating the platform
- Understand what to focus on first
- Experience an early win that signals ROI
- Connect with other members
- Actually believe this community will deliver on its promise
And we need to do all of that without overwhelming them. Without burying them in information. Without making them feel like they just enrolled in a second job.
Some of this is navigational—helping people find their way. Some of it is relational—helping them feel like they belong. The mistake I kept making was treating both the same way.
You practically need degrees in psychology, sociology, and biology to address everything onboarding is supposed to accomplish. The cognitive load research. The motivation science. The social dynamics of belonging. The biological reality is that people are tired, distracted, and juggling twelve other priorities.
It's a lot to compress into "just enough to get them going."
Meeting Members Where They Are Sounds Simple. It Isn't.
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Every onboarding guide tells you to meet your members where they are and bridge them to transformation. And yes—that's the work. But actually doing it? That's where it gets messy.
Because "where they are" isn't one place. Your members arrive with different skill levels, expectations, time commitments, and reasons for joining. Some are ready to dive in. Some are skeptical. Some signed up three weeks ago and are just now logging in.
This is where I've started leaning on AI—not to automate the human stuff, but to handle the variability. Using AI to analyze where members actually drop off, surface patterns in the questions they're asking, and even draft personalized nudges based on behavior. It doesn't replace the judgment calls. But it gives me better data to make them.
Bridging the gap means making judgment calls about what's essential versus what's just nice to have. It means ruthlessly cutting things you spent hours creating because they're getting in the way. It means accepting that no single onboarding flow will work perfectly for everyone.
I've learned to ask myself one question over and over: What's the minimum they need to know to get their first win?
Not everything. Not the full picture. Just enough to move.
The First Win Matters More Than the First Lesson
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Early in my community-building career, I designed onboarding like a course. Module one, module two, module three. Logical. Comprehensive. Completely ineffective. (This works for some communities, though.)
Members don't need a comprehensive introduction in their initial interactions. They need momentum.
Now I think about onboarding as getting someone to one meaningful action as fast as possible. Not 20 actions. One. Something they can complete in a single session that makes them feel like joining was already worth it.
That first win is psychological. It shifts them from "let me see if this is valuable" to "okay, this is working." That's relational. But they can't get there if they're lost in the navigation.
The hard part is figuring out what that win actually is for your specific community. It's different for everyone. And it often takes multiple iterations to get right.
Clarity Is a Byproduct of Iteration
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I want to say this clearly: the iteration doesn't mean you're behind. It means your community is evolving. What worked for 20 members won't work when you reach 100. What worked at 100 won't hold at 500. And beyond the numbers, your members change—their expectations shift, the platform evolves, the world outside your community keeps moving. That's not a flaw in your process. That's the process working.
Each version teaches you something. You notice where people drop off. You see what questions keep coming up. You learn which resources get used and which get ignored.
AI has accelerated this loop for me. What used to take weeks of manual review now surfaces in hours. The iteration cycle hasn't changed—but my ability to spot what needs iterating has.
That feedback is the raw material for the next iteration. And the next one. And the one after that.
I used to see each update as evidence that I'd failed to get it right. Now I see it as the process working exactly as it should. Onboarding is a living system, not a finished product. The updates are the work.
If you're constantly tweaking your onboarding, you're not doing it wrong. You're paying attention.
Simplicity Is the Hardest Thing to Design
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The temptation is always to add more. More resources. More guidance. More options. It feels generous. It feels thorough.
But every addition is also friction. Every "helpful" extra is one more thing competing for your member's limited attention.
The real design challenge isn't "what else can I include?" It's "what can I remove and still get them where they need to go?"
I've learned that when members feel overwhelmed, the answer is almost never more explanation. It's fewer choices. Clearer priority. A simpler path forward.
Simple is hard. But simple is what works.
Where I'm Taking This Next
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The next frontier for me is AI agents—specifically, Circle's AI Agent for onboarding.
The idea isn't to replace the human welcome. It's to give new members a guide that's available at 2 am when they finally log in, that remembers what they've already completed, and that can answer "where do I start?" without requiring them to search through resources or wait for a reply.
I'm thinking about it as a layer that handles the navigational overwhelm so I can focus on the relational work—the parts that actually require me. Personalized check-ins. Spotting who's disengaging. Creating those early win moments that no automation can manufacture.
I'll be honest—I'm not mourning the loss of "let me share my screen and show you around" sessions. Some parts of community building I'll gladly hand to the robots.
It's still early. I'm not sure what will work and what will feel hollow. But that's consistent with everything else I've learned about onboarding: you try, you watch, you iterate.
What I'm Still Figuring Out
BigstockI don't have onboarding solved. I'm not sure anyone does. The members change, the platform evolves, and what worked six months ago might not work today.
But I've made peace with that. Onboarding isn't a problem to solve once; it's a practice to refine continuously.
If you're in the middle of your own iteration cycle, know that you're in good company. Keep watching where people get stuck. Keep asking what the real first win should be. Keep cutting until it feels almost too simple.
And then update it again in three months when you learn something new.
That's the work.
