Sometimes, avoiding conflict in the workplace can be difficult. However, it's extremely doable.
Related:How To Deal With Conflict In The Workplace
Here's a personal example:
While at work one day, I received an instant message from a colleague.
It read, “Do you have a minute to chat?"
“Of course," I responded.
Instantly, the phone rang.
To be honest, I assumed this would be a routine call pertaining to a joint proposal this co-worker and I were collaborating on, and so I was a bit blindsided by what followed.
“I came across a post you wrote recently about rolling your eyes in a meeting," she said. “And I just wanted to ask if you were writing about me."
Awkward silence.
The truth is, I did write a post about a meeting where I had behaved uber-immaturely and, yes, she was the voice on the phone.
I explained the situation: I was rolling my eyes at the characteristically bureaucratic nature of corporate decision-making and the post was about my mistake and not her.
She listened politely, seemed genuinely interested in the root cause of my ire, and we hung up the phone. But here's the catch: rather than feel defensive or put on the spot, I felt fine.
No drama. No hurt feelings. No lingering doubts or suspicions.
Now, let's contrast this to how she could have handled the situation, shall we? Upon reading my post, she could have...
Silently sulked, but not said a word. (Of course, every time she saw me from that point on she would secretly have negative blog flashbacks.)
Publicly sulked by trashing me to everyone BUT me.
Forwarded the post to a few mutual colleagues with colorful commentary such as, “Who does this *{replace1}amp;^ think she is?"
To her credit, she didn't choose any of the above (all-too-common) options.
In fact, I wanted to use this post to highlight exactly what she did right, so you'll know how to handle it if you ever find yourself in a similarly sticky situation.
1. She Came Directly To Me
Most people don't like conflict, and so they avoid it at all costs. Therefore, it takes an incredible amount of maturity to go to the person who has “offended" you and clear the air in person. (It's obviously FAR easier to talk about them behind their back, and that's why the majority go that route.)
2. She Reached Out To Make Sure It Was A Good Time To Talk
Since this could have been an emotional conversation (remember: she didn't know how I would react), it was smart to make sure I wasn't under a deadline or otherwise distracted.
3. She Approached The Call From A Standpoint Of Confusion
(“I wasn't sure if you were talking about me") versus accusation (“I can't believe you said that about me.") This subtle distinction made all the difference, i.e. rather than feel attacked, I felt camaraderie and we actually hung up the phone closer as team members than before.
4. Once She Got To Bottom Of My Issue, She Offered To Help
Can you imagine? Here she thought I was visibly disrespecting her (in front of her boss, mind you) and she ends the call by asking if there's anything she can do to help make my life easier. Whoa!
In our reality-TV driven culture, where we are all so immersed in conflict, short fuses, and a general lack of civility, it's nice to see some people still value and respect maturity. You would be wise to follow my colleague's example. (And I'm not just saying that because I know she reads my blog now.)
This post was originally published at an earlier date.
Is your job search turning into a grind with no end in sight? It may be time to take a step back and reevaluate your entire approach.
In cold weather climates, the beginning of spring is a time to clean the house and get organized—a practice known as spring cleaning. Through the years, spring cleaning has taken on a larger meaning with people using the time to organize and declutter things in their lives.
For professionals on the job hunt, a little spring cleaning (metaphorically speaking) could be a great way to reinvigorate your job search. Here are a few strategies your job search spring cleaning should include.
Reevaluate Your Job Search Approach
Bigstock
Make a list of the last handful of jobs you applied for and see if you can identify any positive or negative trends. Consider things like:
How did I learn about this job?
How did I apply for the job?
Did I earn an interview?
What was the ultimate result?
A lot can be learned about your job search approach just by answering these questions and identifying patterns. For example:
Negative Trends
You discovered five jobs through job boards, applied to all of them via the job boards, and never heard back from any of them.
The common pattern here is applying through job boards. This isn't to say that job boards don't serve a purpose in the job search process, but they have their limitations, and you can't run your job search entirely off of them. When you apply through a job board, there's a good chance that your materials will never get past the applicant tracking system (ATS) and never be seen by an actual person.
One simple fix is to research who the hiring manager or recruiter is that posted the position and email your materials to them directly.
The more efficient fix would be to take a proactive approach by putting together a bucket list of companies that you want to work for and start making connections on LinkedIn with people who work at those companies. You may already know some people who work there or have connections that can refer you to some individuals.
This is a great way to network your way onto a company's radar.
Positive Trends
You applied to three jobs via referral, were invited to two job interviews, and made it through multiple rounds of interviews for one of the jobs before being passed over for someone with a little more experience.
The pattern here is that getting referred to a job by a professional acquaintance is a great way to land a job interview. This indicates that you're leveraging your network well and you should continue to focus on your networking efforts.
The next step is to review the interview process and determine what went well and what needs to be improved. Sometimes the interviewer will provide feedback, and that feedback can be valuable. However, not everyone is comfortable with giving feedback.
Chances are you probably have a good idea about areas of improvement and the skills you need to gain. Put together a plan for addressing those shortfalls.
The good news in making it deep into any interview process is that it indicates that the company likes you as a potential employee (even if the timing just wasn't right) and the experience could be a roadmap to a job with that company at a later date, or another similar opportunity elsewhere.
Give Your Resume & Cover Letter Some Much-Needed Attention
Bigstock
Are you continuously sending similar resumes and cover letters to each job opening with only minor adjustments? If so, your strategy needs some serious spring cleaning.
The reason why it's so important to tailor your resume is that throughout your career, you acquire numerous skills, but the job you're applying for may only be focusing on 6-8 of those skills. In that case, those skills must rise to the top of the resume with quantifiable examples of how you successfully used those skills at previous jobs.
Remember, recruiters go through hundreds of resumes. They need to be able to tell from a quick glance whether or not you're a potential candidate for the position.
While updating your resume, you could also spruce up your LinkedIn profile by highlighting the skill sets that you want to be noticed for by recruiters.
As for writing a good cover letter, the key to success is writing a disruptive cover letter. When you write a disruptive cover letter, you're basically telling a story. The story should focus on how you connect with the particular company and job position. The story could also focus on your personal journey, and how you got to where you currently are in your career.
If your resumes and cover letters aren't unique, now is the time to clean things up and get on track.
Build Your Personal Brand
Just because you're looking for work doesn't mean that you don't have anything to offer. Use previous career experiences and passions to build your personal brand.
Ask yourself, "How do I want other professionals to view me?"
Pick an area of expertise and start sharing your knowledge and experience with your professional network by pushing out content on your LinkedIn and social media accounts. Good content can include blogs, social media posts, and videos.
By sharing content about your experiences and passions, you slowly build your personal brand, and others will start to notice. The content could lead to good discussions with others in your network. It could also lead to reconnecting with connections that you haven't spoken to in years, or making new connections.
You never know when one of these connections could turn into a job lead or referral. The trick is to get on people's radars. So, when you're cleaning up your job search, be sure to build a plan for personal branding.
Maintain Healthy Habits During Your Job Search
Bigstock
Your job search is important, but it's even more important to know when to pull back and focus on personal health and spending time with family and friends.
There are actually things that you can do for your own enjoyment that could help your job search in the long run, such as:
Grab coffee with a friend - It's good to engage in light conversation with friends during challenging times. And if your job search does come up, remember that most people have been through it themselves and you never know when a friend may provide you with a good idea or lead on a job.
Volunteer - Volunteering is a great way to get involved in the community and help others. In addition, if you develop a little bit of a career gap while looking for a job, you can always talk about how you filled that time volunteering, if you're asked about it during a job interview.
Continue to focus on other passions - Are you a fitness nut? Blogger? Crafter? Continue to do the things that bring you happiness. And if you're in a position to profit from your passion through a freelance job or side hustle, even better!
Spring is the perfect time to clean up and improve your job search so you can land the job you want. If you're struggling to find a job, follow the tips above to reinvigorate your job search—and watch your career blossom!
Need more help with your job search?
Become a member to learn how to land a job and UNLEASH your true potential to get what you want from work!
This article was originally published at an earlier date.